This Just In: People Are Stupid
Monday, December 1, 2008
Fat fingers and absent minds are causing a rash of mis-dialed 911 calls to be made from the LBCC campus this fall. According to Bruce Thompson security manager of LBCC and dialing enthusiast, emergency operators are contacted through campus phone lines upward of 5-6 times per week; wasting the valuable time of dispatchers and security personnel alike that would otherwise be allocated to real emergencies. “When we have a false call to take care of, we’re pulling resources,” says Thompson.
The crux of the quandary is the insatiable desire of students and faculty to have contact with the outside world. To dial out of the school’s internal directory you must press 9 then to place a long distance call you naturally hit 1; and that’s where it all goes to hell as lead fingered zealots pound the crap out of that little button twice, accidentally contacting emergency operators and alerting the security staff. “We get a lot of them every year, anytime you have that combination of numbers you’re going to talk to 911 operators,” says Thompson with assurity.
So how can you, the average Joe or Jill, prevent this unnecessary fluctuation of collateral dialing damage? Well for starters, you can stop it. In my over four years of experience utilizing opposable thumbs I have yet to incorrectly dial a search and rescue team when sending a fax. You too can hope to reach such heights if you dare, and I’m not the only one that has faith in you. “Take your time dialing, make sure you get the right number the first time,” Thompson slowly explains. So the next time you make a fist and blindly punch at the faceplate of a phone, think of poor little Jimmy dying in a ditch somewhere after his Segway was overturned all because E.M.T’s were too busy responding to your Sunday call to mom. Will that make your mother happy, knowing the cost of your call was poor little Jimmy’s life? I don’t think she’ll accept that charge.
Comment
I find the ending to this very offensive!! People so make mistakes you know.
— corina · Dec 2, 09:46 AM · #
Was saying so instead of do a joke? If so, well played miss…well played.
— Rick · Dec 2, 12:59 PM · #
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